Today's Daily Fluff is about one of the all time bad Christmas songs, "Do They Know It's Christmas?", but there are actually many, many bad Christmas songs that deserve to be noticed as well. "Do They Know It's Christmas?" may win the coveted Bad Preachy Activist Rock Award, but there are so many other seasonal irritations, it's hard to choose an all-time worst. Though I do have some contenders:
"The Christmas Shoes"--A strong competitor for the win, with its cheesy story about some poor Dickensian urchin trying to buy shoes for his dying mother. If your mother truly only has hours to live, what are you doing shopping for shoes? How will shoes (as opposed to a blouse or dress or something) make her look, "beautiful if Mama meets Jesus tonight"? And, of course, it has a section sung by overly precious child singers which threatens to send the listener into a diabetic coma. And it may just be me, but it's also royally annoying to hear how self-congratulatory the narrator is about helping the kid buy the shoes when he (the kid) came up short. Jeez, I did that the other day for a woman who was short for her breakfast muffin--it doesn't exactly make you Philanthropist of the Year.
"Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree"/"Jingle Bell Rock"--These are mostly here as part of my campaign against the inappropriate use of the word "rock" as a verb. I cannot think of anything that has less call for being "rocked" than Christmas, unless it's the Children's Burn Unit at St. Vincent's Hospital.
Anything by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra--Now I realize that a lot of people really like their stuff. On the other hand, a lot of people also think that Carlos Mencia is funny, and that is clearly not true. It's over-produced, generic, and ridiculously bombastic. And yes, I realize that statement could apply equally to both Carlos Mencia and the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, which is kind of my point.
So, anyone have any least favorite Christmas carols to add to the list?